My Funny Valentine

I always dreaded Valentine's day. One, I think it's just a Hallmark holiday. Second, it makes single people feel like shit as it just comes with so much expectation and anticipation. Third, it's just cheesy. I hate anything too contrived or required too much unnatural effort, especially when it comes to expressing love. I hate it even more that people choose to do it all together on this one day - buying flowers and chocolates, romantic dinners, showing off gestures of love where it probably should have been done regularly, without reminding. God, do I sound like a bitter woman here?

Well, there had been some good Valentine's moments in my life. As I was reminiscing some old Valentine's day stories with my co-worker today, I remembered my first Valentine. I was 11, living in England, with my first boyfriend, Eurek Kingfisher. I don't think we have been going out long so we didn't talk about what we would do on Valentine's day. If I recalled correctly (from more than 20 years ago! Ahhhh!), Valentine's day fell on a Friday. That weekend, our school had a mandatory exit where we all had to leave the school to return home or in my case, my guardian's home for the weekend. Eurek's parents came in town early and took him out on Thursday so I didn't see him for a while. That Friday afternoon as I was heading back to my dorm to pack, Eurek suddenly appeared and hastily shoved a box in my hand, followed by a quick kiss on the lip and then left. I can't remember if someone was with me or not but I remembered hiding the box under my cape. Then once I got to the dorm, I quickly packed the box into my bag and left town. I guess I was embarrassed. So embarrassed. The box looked cheesy and I didn't dare to open it in front of people. Once I got to my home in London, I closed and locked the door behind me and examined the box like an alien specimen. Inside the box was a white Valentine's teddy holding a heart with a red ribbon tied to a piece of red velvety material to attach to the box. It was sooooooo cheesy and cheap so I threw everything but the teddy away and buried it deep in the garbage can. I don't think I ever thanked Eurek and I tried to forget that ever happened, but I kept kissing him when I got back to school anyway! LOL!

As I told this story to my co-worker, Naomi today, she said that sometimes, we girls think we were just too cool to get all sentimental. But now that we are much older, these sentiments are so so precious and innocent. Poor Eurek, I hope I hadn't squashed all his ideals of romance. That moment, with his puppy eyes and the kiss as he gave me the teddy was so funny and sweet. Oh, my funny Valentine! My sweet little Valentine...

"My Funny Valentine" by Stan Getz and Chet Baker

Thank you very very much!

It's been a while since I really wrote anything substantial or meaningful. This has to do with my crazy work schedule but also my inability to say no to socializing. However, I believe it is exactly that - the interconnections of human relationships which has enriched my life and inspired me to ignore everything else that I need or wish to do tonight but to record what I have experienced in the last 30 hours. Though nothing is exceptionally major but so many little things had happened. This is in no particular order:

1. Various comments and acknowledgments from friends all over the world wishing me a Happy Chinese New Year, my favorite childhood holiday.

2. A text from a very good friend full of juicy, crazy gossips from home.

3. Another text from my sister, trying to schedule a skype chat because she misses me.

4. A "I am thinking of you" email from my ex, who has remained to be one of my most loyal friends.

5. Dinner with Amanda, my little fake Mexican, a wonderfully, intelligent young lady with the whole world ahead of her.
6. A sweet friend suggested to grab some Chinese dinner on the first day of Chinese New Year. If it wasn't for him, I'd probably gone home with a half-priced bento.

7. A cute and fairly accurate animated depiction of me from a talented co-worker.


8. A surprise visit from an ex-student who came just to tell me she's going to Australia for a year and that I have been a good teacher to her. (Another ex-student came 2 months ago to let me know she got a job with a major airline company and thanked me for her success.)

9. All the sweet, beautiful, Japanese girlfriends I have here that are always keeping in touch with me everyday.

10. Co-workers planning my birthday party, even though it's a month away. And some affectionate teasing from them as well.

11. Nothing but fantastic students all day. In especially to my favorite super smart student who spent most of his private lesson time informing me about farmers' markets and organic farming in Japan because he knows I am interested in it.

12. Emails from friends about dinners and various plans for this weekend.

13. A visit from my neighborhood kitty (okay, she's not human but she was like my boyfriend in the first few months when I got to Japan) who never fails to give me plenty of rubbin' luvin'.

14. Last but not least, and probably what is going to make me smile as I go to sleep tonight. And this is almost worth a blog entry of its own - a note from an old, bicycle parking attendant at my train station. Ever since he cleverly discovered that I am not Japanese and he fearlessly spoke in English at every opportunity he sees me, he has become my favorite ojiisan おじいさん (grandfather). Anyway, as I went to pick up my bike tonight, I saw this sweet note below. Not only my bike is not stolen despite of my carelessness, I am once again in awe of my blessed fortune, especially from the people who have helped me and supported me through the maze of this intricate and strangely fascinating country.


To my friends, and to 日本. With love and appreciation.
Once again, どもありがとうございました!

Remembering Martin Luther King Jr.

Ever since my visit to Atlanta, Georgia, the birthplace of Martin Luther King, Jr., and the teachings from the many wonderful educators at Fielding, I have decided to pay special attention in remembering and reflecting on the work and life of Martin Luther King, Jr. each year on MLK day.

This year, I spent half an hour listening to a reflection from Dr. King's lawyer and advisor, Clarence Jones, on the march and his famous "I have a dream" speech in Lincoln Memorial on August 1963. Though I already know quite a bit about the history of King's work, I was surprised to learn that the particular part on "I have a dream" was all improvised. It was King's speaking from the heart and propheting to what American is today and can continue to evolve in the future.

Behind the Dream
by Clarence B. Jones

Teacher of the Month

Something small to celebrate my one year anniversary in Japan. Anyway, here's my phoney acceptance speech, along with comments from my manager and head teacher:

＜Tiffani先生のコメント＞
What a delightful surprise to receive the Teacher of the Month! I am most honored and humbled by this recognition.

Many thanks to the Honbu staff, who have continuously provided me with care and guidance in navigating through life as an AEON teacher. In addition, I would like to thank the Tenjin staff and my fellow teachers, who are the backbone of my success. Not only are they competent, supportive, and dedicated professionals, they are also very kind and fun to work with. They – Atsuko, Kayoko, Hitomi, Kaori, Kimie, Wasim, Amanda, Naomi, and Nozomi - deserve to share this recognition with me as I would not have been able to do well without them.

Though teaching at AEON can sometimes be very challenging and there are many responsibilities to juggle with, at the end of the day, it is very rewarding to know that I have made a difference with my students - from the small scale of learning some new vocabulary to the larger scale of inspiring them to improve their everyday lives. I am grateful to have been given this opportunity to live and work in Japan. I hope I can continue to make further contributions at AEON and beyond in the near future!

＜宮崎マネージャー代理のコメント＞
Tiffani先生はイーオンに勤務して1年弱ですが、どんな層の生徒様からも非常に人気があり、生
徒様の心をつかんで離さない力をもっています。
また、セルフスタディーでは外国人教師のWasim先生と共にリーダーになり、
ビジネスミーティングや他の場面でもしっかりリーダーとして他のスタッフを束ね、
やる気にさせている姿を度々見て、非常に感心させられます。
セルフスタディーの販売においても、時間がある限り、生徒様とアポを取り、カウンセリング
を実施しています。
九州で1番になりたい！という気持ちも強いですし、なにより生徒様の上達を真剣に考えお勧
めしています。
今後も外国人教師のリーダーとして天神校をひっぱってもらいたい教師です。

＜森野先生のコメント＞
Tiffani先生は、まだ赴任して1年も経っていませんが、
生徒様の心をしっかり掴み、生徒様の立場になり、何をおいても生徒様との関係を大事にする
先生です。
生徒様が困っているようであれば、何をおいても助けようとしますし、厳しさが必要なときに
は厳しく指導してくれます。
授業の質は言うに及ばず、SSCやビジネス面での協力もとてもすぐれています。
必要な時には必ず率先して何事もしてくれる頼れる先生です。
私としては、これからもずっと天神校で一緒に働いてもらえたらと思う私の支えになってくれ
ている先生です。

Life lesson #4354312847

I didn't use to really understand why some people would get so easily disappointed by other people's action. I know some follow with consequences but I was naive to think that one should not care so much if it doesn't have a direct affect on them or if you are not the victim. I guess over time, as I matured and evolved as an adult, I became more self-aware and I noticed that these behaviors caused by others shaped how I think.

Tonight, I was disappointed by an action of a friend. Though the action has no direct affect on me, I questioned the integrity of the person. To be fair, I know I have also disappointed people with my actions so I am in no position to pass judgment. In fact, I am questioning of whether I can stay neutral or choose not say anything about it (to the friend) because the bottom line is that it does not affect me directly. But again, I am disappointed. I want to know what caused this person to do it. I want to know the truth. Most of all, I want to know how I can change it.

As I become more and more single these days, I realized I have only myself to look after first and foremost. I am writing this to remind myself that I should be careful of whom I let in my life but also keep an open mind to allow positivity and various influences to flow through. I don't want to be judgmental and I don't want to take life too seriously but at the same time, I want to treat things that matter with respect and integrity. Today, I learned that you can be disappointed in others but I don't think it is up to me to pass judgment but only as a lesson to become aware of the complexity and vulnerability of human relationships.

I will remember you

My dearest 爺爺 (yeah yeah/grandpa),

You are my role model.

When I think of you, I always think of how you used to carry me up the stairs to your old apartment on your back, like "mai ju zai", a little piggy on sale. I used to laugh all the way from the moment you had me on your back. Another memory was how you used to lead a group of people hiking all over the hills of Hong Kong in the winter and go swimming in the islands near Sai Kung in the summer. I still remembered how you pretended that you accidently bumped me off the boat, just for laughs.

But there is so much than just your sense of adventure, sense of humor, and knack for fun. You also have so much humanity. You have devoted your life as a father of four, grandfather of eight, and a wonderful husband to a beautiful, capable woman. You are kind and generous to your friends and you continued to have many friends to now, at age 93, almost 94. You were a dedicated volunteer to a Kowloon homeless shelter and served as the chairman for many years, by which you have given and raised much money to allow the shelter to grow and became an important place to those in need in Hong Kong. Yet all of this, you served humbly, never bragging how much you have put in but only appreciated what you were given and received.

These days, you know you are not the same anymore. You know that you have trouble with your memories, and I know how much it upsets you that you can't walk and go to places you used to go or wherever you want. When I asked you if you thought you would live this long, you said you never thought of it. Though I am sure you have but I think it's not something you question everyday because you live the moment. Now that your horizon has narrowed, you told me you are accepting that the life will bring you to a stage where you acknowledge what it is and you let it go to live the best of your ability and most of all, at its presence. Then each day, you live simplier and happier, and you look forward to those small things that make a difference and you move to things are that near and most important to you.

I wish you were closer to me, grandpa. I miss you lots.

Love,
柏琪 (Pak Kay)

Me...

Maybe I know, somewhere
Deep in my soul
That love never lasts
And we've got to find other ways
To make it alone
Keep a straight face

And I've always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable, distance
And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I'm
Content with loneliness
Because none of it was ever worth the risk